I have a birthday soon, too soon. It’s tomorrow. I won’t share with you how old I am, but I recently took a twenty-question quiz on Facebook. It was comprised of items from the past. If you remembered all 20 of them, then you were “older than dirt.” I was “older than dirt.” Each year around this time I think about my age in years. Other times the aging process reminds me of my age in aches and pains. Both make me wonder how long I can get away with creating protagonists who are half my age. I know nothing about what life is like for those who can wear trendy clothing. Maybe that’s why, in my most recent short story which will be a podcast from King’s River Life Magazine later this year, my protagonist is a pot-bellied pig. It’s not the first time I featured a pot-belly in my mysteries. There was Desdemona in the book from Untreed Reads, Angel Sleuth. That was the beginning for that little pig. Dessie soon found herself in a short story from Untreed Reads “Dessie’s Jaded Past.” Writing mysteries starring pot-bellies as detectives is an easy way of avoiding the problem of an old author creating a youngish protagonist. Pot-bellies seem to be ageless; no one cares what they watch on TV or even if they watch TV, and their tiny hooves don’t handle text messaging well, so they rarely carry cell phones. Besides, no pockets to carry the phones in.

As for human protagonists, I think I’ve conquered the issue of creating younger protagonists by setting my stories in areas of the country that are county where the landscape is a strong presence. For example, Eve Apple in my Eve Apple mysteries has alligators and swamps to keep her busy. She may text on occasion but is mostly engaged with solving crimes by physically chasing criminals or discovering clues by talking to people in person. Eve’s family and friends take up her time; the series is driven not only by the mystery but by Eve’s relationships. And because I’ve created a busy life for her, she does not spend much time ordering items on line, shopping at malls (there are few of them in rural Florida) or watching anything much on TV.  Scenes take place at the local cowboy bars, barbecue restaurants, pawn shops, on airboats or in canoes, in Eve’s consignment shop, in a swamp shack, or in the Miccosukee cabin owned by her grandfather-in-law. That doesn’t leave time for engaging in whatever else younger folk like. And, oh yes, did I mention that there’s a bit of romance for Eve also?

My other series set in rural Florida also features a retired preschool teacher, Emily Rhodes, older than Eve, so an easier write for me. Although Emily is not quite as physical as Eve, she had her share of outside adventures including some of which feature swamps and swamp dwellers, animal and human. Emily is very much like the people who come to rural Florida to spend their winters fishing the Big Lake and chowing down on barbecue ribs and catfish, hush puppies and cole slaw. These folks do watch a lot of television. Emily does not. She often works nights bartending. She comes closer to the world I understand, retired from one career and carving out a second one. Of course, I don’t have the same propensity for stumbling over dead bodies that Emily does, but we share a view of life where people and food are more important than “friending” a stranger on Facebook or sharing pictures of our dinner on the internet. Okay, I admit. I have done both.

Because Emily and her friends love food as do I, the new book in the series due out this summer, Scream Muddy Murder, will contain a selection of recipes from Emily’s good friend, Vicki. Look for it soon.

I also admit that I know a little about what someone half my age does because I watch some television programs that provide clues to their likes and dislikes, and I read about their lives on the internet. My stepsons, who are approaching forty, are another source of information about that generation. Unfortunately, that only provides me with guy data. Those of you who have children and grandchildren who are female are in a better place to create a female protagonist.

As you can see, I think I’ve found my way around the age issue. I’m certain writers like me grapple with this issue also. How do you craft a young protagonist? Or do you?

-from the desk of someone “older than dirt”